Hope
by midnightread
Summary: A spoiler free story for the end of Valkyrie and the start of Dreamworld about Rick and Kate dealing with the cliff hanger from the end of the episode.
1. Chapter 1

**This is a tag to the end of Valkyrie. I haven't seen any of the spoilers, not even the promo for Dreamworld, so this was written with no idea at all what is actually going to happen.**

**I think it's going to have a few chapters, hopefully all before Dreamworld airs but I make no promises since I started college last week and it's all been a bit of a culture shock since it's about an hours commute every morning and evening.**

Rick stared at her, digesting and processing what she had just told him. Now he knew why she had been so serious when she had come into the room. Kate was still holding onto his hand, tight. It was almost too tights if Rick was being completely honest with himself. But right now he didn't mind, the pressure she was exerting on his hand was doing a very good job of keeping him grounded.

Kate was sat studying him, trying to see how he was taking it. His face however hadn't changed so she didn't know what was going on in his head.

"I'll have to ring Alexis and mother and tell them that I won't be coming home, it'll be easier for all of us if I just stay here, somewhere away from everyone," Rick muttered eventually, "Ryan and Esposito will need to know to. Oh and I'll have to sort out my will, make sure that everything is in order to look after Alexis, mother and you."

"Rick," Kate whispered.

Rick however ignored her and continued speaking. "It's just a pity that Nicki isn't going to get the ending I had hoped for."

"Rick," Kate spoke again, a little louder this time, "You don't have to do any of that, we're going to find a way to fix this."

Rick gave her a sad smile. "No we're not," he reasoned, "Maybe if we had longer than a day but not in the short amount of time I actually have left." He kept his voice level the whole time he was speaking, still not showing anything on his face.

"I'm taking you back to my place," Kate commented, the tone of her voice leaving no chance of being misunderstood, or overruled.

Rick however didn't accept it as quickly as he should have done. "I thought I was in trouble, will they actually let me out of here? Plus I don't want to get you sick too Kate, it's bad enough that I'm going to die, I don't want to be responsible for taking you with me."

"You're not contagious," Kate quickly disagreed, "I wouldn't have been allowed in here if you were."

Rick nodded absentmindedly, her words made sense but he was making a mental check list of things he would need to get done before tomorrow.

"Rick, look at me," Kate commanded. Once Rick had focused on her properly, not looking through her like he had been doing, she started speaking again. "You're not in trouble with anyone but me Rick, and right now that's being over shadowed by our more pressing issues. You were cleared of any involvement. The only reason you're here is so we could run tests and see if you had been exposed."

"Why are you angry Kate?" Rick questioned when she had finished speaking. "You know as well as anyone that anger doesn't get anything done."

"I'm angry because this is my fault," Kate replied, emotion bleeding into her voice slightly, "If I'd been more careful you wouldn't have been anywhere near this case or that car, you wouldn't be dying and wouldn't have to tell your mother and daughter that it's my fault you're dead."

To anyone who didn't know Kate will it sounded like she was upset but ok. Rick however knew differently, he could tell that she was close to bursting into tears. "It's not your fault," he comforted, "I never was any good at minding my own business. I did exactly what you told me not to do and now I'm paying the price."

"The price is too high," Kate disagreed quickly, "I can't lose you Rick. I've lost too many people already. Loosing you would be the last straw."

As she spoke one of her hands drifted up towards her neckline and she fingered the two rings on the chain. The two rings that to her represented the past and the future. Now however that future was rapidly shrinking into the next few hours.

Rick followed the course of her hand and gave her a sad smile. They both remained like that, hands and eyes locked with Kate's hand touching her rings, until a knock at the door interrupted them. Kate slowly let go of Rick's hand before she stood and headed over to the door, running her hand through her hair as she went, a gesture that told Rick how agitated Kate actually was. She gave Rick a small sad smile before she opened the door and stepped out.

Rick watched as the door shut before he started absentmindedly picking at the plaster on his arm and thinking through what was already written on his will, trying to work out what, if anything, needed changing in the next few hours.

He was broken out of his thoughts by the door being thrown open and Kate coming in. "That was quick," he commented, noticing that she looked a little happier than she had when she had left.

"I've been gone twenty minutes at least," Kate replied slowly, coming to a halt beside him.

"Oh," Rick murmured, "Must have been deeper in thought than I realised."

Kate gave him a worried look before she grabbed both his hands and pulled him to his feet. "Come on Castle," she directed, "We've got work to do."

"It's more pleasure than work but if you want one last time then sure thing," Rick replied, getting to his feet.

Kate narrowed her eyes at him. "Funny Castle. But I actually meant proper work, police work."

The confused Rick. "I thought everything you do is classified," he pointed out as Kate dragged him towards the door.

"It is," Kate agreed, stopping walking towards the door and facing Rick once more. "But I've talked my boss into letting you help with the case."

"Because I'm dying?" Rick inquired sarcastically.

"No," Kate answered quickly, "Because there's a cure."

"A cure?" Rick parroted.

Kate nodded. "There is however a catch."

"It was stolen too," Rick guessed.

Kate nodded again, "But there is hope. If we can find them we can save you."

"Do you have any leads?" Rick wanted to know. Kate shook her head sadly. She went to speak, to tell him that they would find something, that they had to but Rick continued to talk instead, cutting off any chance she had of saying anything. "When I was in the car with Bronson he kept talking about Dreamworld."

"I remember you saying," Kate cut in.

"Well I was talking to Ryan and Espo about the whole abduction thing and Espo knew what Dreamworld meant," Rick continued to say, "It's a ghost military base. Bronson had to have been posted there to know about it and he wouldn't have mentioned it if he didn't think it was something to do with the whole thing."


	2. Chapter 2

"I don't know whether to be angry that you got Kevin and Javi involved in something that you weren't even meant to know about or glad that you might have a lead," Kate confessed

"How about glad," Rick suggested, "You can be angry at me later, when we find the cure."

Kate smiled at him before she started laughing. Rick joined in and it soon turned hysterical as everything that was happening actually came to the front of their minds.

"Kate," Rick whispered, "Everything is going to be ok, right?"

Kate nodded and wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tight, her mind going back to when she had said those words when she was stood on the bomb, unable to move. Rick hugged her back, even tighter than she was hugging him. They stood like for a moment, wrapped up in each other's embrace.

Kate eventually pulled away and dropped her hands to her side. Before Rick did the same he risked giving her a quick kiss on the forehead. She smiled at her and then he dropped his hands away completely and Kate lead the rest of the way out of the door and out into the area where all the other agents were gathered.

Kate led him straight over to her bosses office, where McCord, Villante and Hendricks were all stood, obviously waiting for them. "Behave," Kate muttered just before they went in.

"Ma'am yes ma'am," Rick whispered back as she opened the door.

Kate rolled her eyes before she nodded to the three people already in the office, choosing to give Rick's comment no more validation than that. "Agent Beckett, Mr Castle," Villante greeted them.

"Oh great," Rick muttered in Kate's ear, "What is it with your bosses and calling me Mr Castle?"

Kate ignored him, successfully keeping down the smile that was threatening to break through. Rick got the idea and pursed his lips, not planning on saying anything more unless someone was actually talking to him. Kate couldn't help but wonder how long that would actually last.

Villante obviously hadn't heard Rick's quiet words, or if he had he was ignoring them, because she continued to say, "How are you holding up Mr Castle? I take it Agent Beckett has explained to you what is going on?"

Rick nodded. "Kate said that I'm allowed to help on the case since you think the suspects have the cure with them."

Villante nodded. "Yes and since you managed to do so much without the resources we had Agent Beckett has managed to make a case for you to stay on and work with us, like you used to do in New York if I understand rightly."

Rick and Kate both nodded in agreement with what he had said. "I need you to sign this before we go any further though," Villante continued, placing a piece of paper on his desk and putting a pen on top of it.

"A waver?" Rick asked, "So that my lifeless corpse can't sue the District Attorney."

McCord gave Kate a confused look, as did everyone else in the room. "He's kidding," she clarified, "Just something that came up when he first started shadowing me." She gave Rick a look and he gave her a smile before he read the piece of paper through quickly and signed it with a flourish.

"You seem remarkably calm for someone who's just been told they have less than a day to live," McCord commented as Rick moved back to stand with Kate once more.

"It's because I've looked down the barrel of a gun more than once and thought I was going to die," Rick explained, "And when Alexis was kidnapped and taken to… to…."

"Paris," Kate prompted quickly, keeping the worry out of her voice as well as she could, the symptoms were obviously already starting to show.

"Yeah Paris," Rick continued quickly, trying to cover up the fact he'd forgotten in the first place, "I felt much worse than I do now. It's me who's dying not someone I love so it's easier to deal with."

Kate looked at the floor, unable to look anyone in the room in the eye after what Rick had said. She knew that while he was calm, which had shocked her mildly but now made sense, she was anything but. She was a sea of emotions all trying to break to the surface, the foremost being anger that Rick was in this position in the first place.

The room was silent for a moment, as everyone present processed what Rick had said, and in the calm way that he had actually said it. They had all been working for the DA for a long time and this was the calmest any of them had even seen someone take the threat of imminent death.

"I should have brought my vest," Rick muttered to Kate as the room remained silent.

"No you shouldn't have Castle," Kate murmured back, "Now shush and behave like an adult, if that's possible."

Rick smirked and then looked towards Villante as he spoke again. "Well now that you've signed on the dotted line everything you hear or see in this office is never to be repeated to anyone, not even Agent Beckett in case someone over hears you."

Rick nodded and McCord stepped forward. "Unfortunately we don't have any leads on the suspects or the antidote at the moment but hopefully we will find something soon."

Kate and Rick shared a look before Rick nodded and Kate spoke. "We might have something."

"What?" McCord asked.

Kate looked to Rick to explain. "First off Kate didn't tell me anything about the case," Rick made clear, "I'm too nosy for my own good."

"We already knew that Mr Castle," Villante declared, "Just get to the point where you know something we don't."

"Dreamworld is a military base," Rick responded promptly, "A ghost military base in the Gulf. Highly classified."

Everyone in the room looked at each other before Rick continued the speak, his voice growing a little distant as he did, "He kept asking me if you knew about Valkyrie so I think all of this has something to do with project Valkyrie which is carried out at the Dreamworld military base in the Gulf."

**So I have no idea how long I'm actually going to make this but it may end being more than a few chapters. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Since I'm not going to be able to watch the episode until tomorrow evening please please please don't say how close or how far I was with this story.**

**Thanks to everyone who has reviewed and I will continue to write this even if it becomes AU since I'm really enjoying it, I don't usually write anything that's about death or coming close to death or whatever. **

"That's quite a leap," McCord commented after a minute.

Rick however didn't say anything, just looked into space. Kate reached out a hand to give his shoulder a shake, to get his attention back into the room and what was happening, and it didn't escape anyone's notice how much her hand was shaking. Rick jumped as her hand touched him before he shook his head and looked around, clearly wondering why everyone was looking at him funny.

"You ok?" Kate asked softly.

"Um," Rick muttered, "Yeah I think so. Why's everyone looking at me like that?"

"You sort of spaced out a little on us Castle," Kate explained.

"Oh," Rick continued to mutter, "I hadn't realised sorry."

"Don't worry Castle," Kate whispered, "We'll fix this. I promise, we'll fix this, we have to."

Rick nodded and then they both turned back to the group as McCord spoke again. "How can you be sure that's what Dreamworld and Valkyrie are?"

"Valkyrie is an educated guess," Rick replied, "But I know that I am right about Dreamworld being a secret military base in the Gulf."

"And how do you know that?" Villante wanted to know.

"Just trust that I do," Rick requested, not wanting to get Kate or Esposito into any more trouble than he already had.

Villante and McCord narrowed their eyes at him but didn't say anything more. Instead Villante ordered, "Hendricks, go and see what you can find out about Dreamworld, McCord make some calls and see what we can find out about Valkyrie, if Mr Castle is correct in guessing it's something to do with the military."

McCord and Hendrick nodded and left; each heading over to their desks to get on with their tasks. Villante then turned to Rick and Kate and said, "Agent, take your fiancé home, we'll call you if we find anything, for now I want you to make sure neither of you is suddenly going to break down while we're working this case. I know this is hard on the both of you but we're going to need to both of you on top form if we're going to find this antidote."

Kate nodded and Rick headed for the door. Villante however gestured for Kate to remain for another few moments. "Go and wait by my desk Rick," Kate instructed in a whisper, "I'll come and get you in a minute."

Rick nodded and did as Kate had instructed. Once he was out of the room and the door had shut behind him Villante spoke. "You know what the symptoms are Beckett, are you going to be able to deal with all of them?"

Kate nodded. "He's going to get distant and confused and forget things; I read the information when it came in."

"But can you handle it?" Villante wanted to know.

Kate glanced out of the window, to where Rick was sitting in her chair doing something on his phone. "Yes," she answered, turning back to Villante, "It's not like I have much of a choice anyway is it. Someone's got to look after him and make sure he doesn't get into too much trouble while we find this antidote."

Villante nodded and when he didn't say anymore Kate turned and left the room, heading over to collect Rick. Villante watched and sighed, he really hoped that they could find their suspects, not only to get the chemical back before it could be used again but to get the antidote. He had read Katherine Beckett's file and he knew that a lot of people she had known and loved had died over the years and he wasn't really sure how she would hold together if her fiancé didn't make it. She may well have made a bit of a mess of the training exercise but he knew she could, and would, go far, he could see her going on to do great things, if Richard Castle survived.

Kate walked quickly over to where Rick was sat. Once she was sure that her computer was shut down and everything was in its place she grabbed her jacket and turned to Rick. Luckily he had been watching what she had been doing so he was now standing, ready to go.

As Kate led the way out of the office and out towards the street Rick said, "I don't have any clothes here Kate, I didn't really have much of a chance to get anything before your suits packed me onto a plane and brought me here."

"I've got a few things of yours at my house," Kate responded, "There's enough there to work with."

"Been stealing my shirts again have we Katherine?" Rick teased.

Kate just shook her head. She was glad that, at least for now, Rick was his normal self, even if his words didn't have the usual sound to them. They sounded a little flat, a little less happy than Rick usually did but he had been told that he had less than a day to live so Kate wasn't expecting any different. However what she knew and he didn't was that the chemical would affect him differently to how it had affected Bronson. Because Bronson had been ex special forces he had been well built and well-muscled, and while Rick was no lay about he didn't have quite the same build, which meant that the symptoms would show sooner in him than they had in Bronson although the time between getting it into his system and dying would be the same.

Kate had told Villante that she could handle it, and she would, but she knew that each time Rick forgot something or zoned out she would get more worried and more than likely her heart would break a little bit more.

It didn't take them long to get back to Kate's house and when they got out of the cab, Kate hadn't wanted to leave McCord without her car, Rick looked around and declared, a smile covering his face, "I'm really glad I helped you buy a house rather than an apartment. Looks much nicer."

Kate wasn't sure if this was just him having a moment or him being his normal goof ball self. Because of that she chose not to answer, just lead the way into the house. Once they were inside Rick sighed, "I don't want to ring mother and Alexis, I won't be able to keep it together if I have to talk to them."

"There's no need to call them," Kate insisted, "Everything is going to be fine. No need to worry them when nothing is going to happen."

Rick gave her a sad smile. "I know that you're trying to stay positive and trying to keep me positive but I need to make sure they both know that I love them."

"Rick," Kate whispered, placing a hand on his cheek, "They know that you love them Rick. How could they not."

"I just want to leave them with something," Rick whispered, leaning into her hand, "I want to say goodbye but I can't do it over the phone. Being here with you is hard enough, knowing that not all my dreams are going to come true."

Kate took a deep calming breath to steady herself before she replied. "Write to them Rick. Write down everything you want to and then you can say goodbye and leave them something in a way that is you through and through."

Rick gently kissed her lips in thanks, neither needing words to say just how much they meant to each other.


	4. Chapter 4

Kate worked on something for the two of them to eat, even though neither of them were really all that hungry, while Rick started to work on his letters, knowing that if he didn't get them done now he never would. Kate watched as he found one of the notebooks that Kate kept around and sat at the table and started to write.

Kate knew that they both needed to eat, even though neither had much of an appetite right now, so she decided to make something simple but that took a lot of concentration to make so her mind wouldn't have a chance to wonder and think about what was happening to Rick not ten feet from her.

Rick took a moment before he put pen to paper. First he wrote the letter for Martha.

_Dear Mom_, he wrote, _Even though I never said it and I always have a joke I hope you know that I love you more than anyone could ever love their mother. You raised me on your own, mostly at least, and while keeping up an acting career and for that I am so grateful and honoured, there aren't many people who could have done what you did and done it so well. I know sometimes I've acted like a spoilt kid but I have always so appreciated all that you have done for me and all that you continue to do for me.  
I'm so sorry that I couldn't see you one last time in person, or even call you on the phone, but I would rather you remember me being escorted away by the men in black then of the son who was dying on the other end of the phone, more fitting given my history really isn't it. I know you will but I'm going to ask anyway, please look after Alexis for me. Also, please don't blame Kate, this was nothing to do with her, this was all me being stupid and not listening to what she told me, just like always, except this time it ended badly.  
I love you  
Your son  
Richard_

He finished the short letter, having written everything that he felt was important and put the pen down, he then ripped the page out of the notebook and folded it and placed it in one of the three envelopes he had found in Kate's desk. He then sealed it before he wrote _Mother _on the front and set it to one side. He then picked up his pen again and started on his letter to Alexis.

_Hey Pumpkin_, he started before he stopped for a moment to think. The letter he had written to his mother had been hard but this one was going to be even worse because Alexis was his daughter, his pride and joy. He took a breath before he put the pen back to the paper. _This is hard for me to write and I know that it will be hard for you to read. I just want you to know that I love you more than anyone or anything and I am so glad that you grew up to be the amazing, clever, young woman you have become over the last few years. I haven't called you because I don't want you to worry, if you've got this letter then we tried everything we could and it didn't work and I don't want you to worry, I want you to have fun with Fruitarian boy.  
I love you pumpkin so so much and I want you to make sure that you keep an eye on Kate. She's had a hard enough time as is and she's going to need all the love and support she can get, as will you and mother and I want the three most important people in my life to be there for each other.  
Love Dad_

Once again he folded the paper and put it in an envelope, sealed it and addressed it. He then looked up and towards the kitchen where he could see that Kate was busy and not paying any attention to him. He then pulled the third piece of paper towards himself and started to write.

_Kate, I don't know what to say. I mean you know what's happening and you know what is going to happen, probably better than me actually since I'm sure the full effects are being kept from me, but no matter. I love you Kate and I'm just sorry that it took us so long to come to where we are now, even if it is in two different cities. We could have made it work, we both want this too much to fail at that and I'm just sorry that we didn't get a chance to be truly great forever.  
I wanted to be your one and done and I wanted you to be my third time lucky but if you're reading this then I guess that isn't happening, which if I'm honest really sucks.  
I've already said the same to mother and Alexis but I want the three of you to stick together. I don't want you to blame yourself for this Kate, I stuck my nose in where it didn't belong and now I'm getting it cut off._ Rick looked up again towards his fiancé and smiled sadly to himself. He didn't know how long he sat looking at her as she moved around the kitchen, cooking with ease and grace, but when she looked towards him he realised that it must have been a while. Not wanting to worry Kate about another loss of time he just gave her a smile before he turned back to what he was doing. _I love you Kate and I'm going to make sure that you Alexis and my mother are well looked after once I'm gone.  
Love Rick_

He put his pen down and once the letter was in the envelope he put it between the one's for his mother and Alexis. "Do you think I should write something for Kevin and Javi?" Rick asked, looking up and towards Kate, who took a moment to turn towards him.

"If you want to," Kate answered. She knew that Ryan, Esposito and Rick had become firm friends over the years and she was so glad that they had since the boys, and Lanie, were her family.

"How long until you're done?" Rick asked then.

"About ten minutes," Kate replied.

Rick nodded and picked up the pen again. Kate continued to watch him for another moment before she returned to the cooking, making sure nothing had burnt, or would burn, because she had been talking to Rick.

Rick quickly got back to writing. _Hey Ryan and Javier. I should probably write two letters, one for each of you, but if I'm being honest I'm beginning to struggle a bit but I don't want Kate to know that so one letter it is. I just wanted to say that the two of you have been great, especially at getting me out of trouble when Kate wouldn't or couldn't. I know this is a pretty crappy way to say goodbye, and to say thank you but it's going to have to do since I can't do this over the phone. I can hardly look at Kate without feeling like I'm letting her down and causing her even more pain in what has already been a painful life, so I really don't think I could manage a phone call to wither of you, in front of her.  
Anyway, I just want to wish Ryan and Jenny the best of luck with their baby, I hope they have even half of the compassion that Ryan and Jenny both possess. Javi, I want to wish you and Lanie all the best as you try it again. I want the two of you to have the happy endings that right now are looking pretty unlikely for Kate and me.  
Plus, can you please keep an eye on mother, Alexis and Kate, make sure they are ok and none of them do anything stupid, plus keep an eye on Alexis' new guy Pi, can't say I'm a fan of that fruitarian.  
Castle_

He put his pen down before quickly pocking it back up again and continuing to write, _P.S. Tell Lanie thanks for everything, for giving Alexis a chance at the morgue and for always being there for Kate. And, if you want it, you're more than welcome to share the Ferrari, I've even written it into the will, so long as you share it._

Happy that this time he had indeed finished Rick addressed the final envelope, put it with the others and put the pen down. He looked over to where Kate was just beginning to plate up everything. She looked up and gave him a smile before picking up both the plates and carrying them over to the table. She placed over just to the side of Rick, for him to move once he had tidied up what he had been doing, before she placed hers at the place opposite Rick and headed off the go and get some cutlery.

**So this looks like it could actually be fairly long but who knows how long it will actually take. Anyway, Dreamworld was awesome even if leaving it down to the wire was a little bit of a cliche. Anyway, hopefully the next chapter should be along soon(ish)**


	5. Chapter 5

They ate quickly and in silence, neither really knowing quite what to say to the other. They both knew that Rick was dying and they both knew that he didn't really have long left but neither could think of anything to say about it, both were trying the best they could to deny that there was even a possibility of it really happening.

When they had finished Kate cleared the table while Rick went and set the four envelopes on the table by the door, leaning them up against the wall so that the envelope addressed to Ryan and Esposito was facing the room.

He stared at them for a moment until a soft hand on the back of his neck brought him back to reality. He turned around and saw that Kate was standing behind him, a worried look on her face. "You've been standing here staring into space the whole time I was doing the dishes Rick."

"I hadn't realised," Rick answered, "It didn't feel all that long to me."

"You're losing time," Kate whispered, the worry clear in her voice. Rick nodded although he didn't fully understand the implications like Kate did. "That's a symptom of the toxin Rick."

"I know," Rick answered, "That's why I didn't want to tell you, because you know what it means more than I do."

Kate quickly moved forward and wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her face in his chest. Rick buried his face in her hair and breathed in her scent before he wrapped his arms tightly around and hugged her back. They held each other tightly, both using the physical presence of the other to keep the emotions that threatened to break to the surface in check.

Rick had no clue how long they stood there, just holding each other, but eventually Kate pulled away and took his hand and pulled him towards the bedroom. "We need to sleep," she mumbled as they walked, "We need to keep our strengths up for tomorrow."

"Kate," Rick muttered, stopping and tugging on her arm to make her stop too, "I don't want to sleep; I couldn't even if I wanted to. I don't even have a day left to live; I don't want to waste any time."

"Rick," Kate whispered, her free hand going up to gently cup his cheek, "You need to sleep, the lower your heart rate the slower the chemical will spread, hopefully."

"You don't sound all that sure Kate," Rick pointed out.

"I know," Kate answered honestly, "But at this precise moment in time it's all we've got until McCord and Hendricks find a lead." Rick knew that what she was saying made sense but he really didn't want to lose all that time. "Rick, we should sleep for at least a few hours and then we can go back to the office and see what's what," Kate insisted, stroking his face lightly as she spoke.

Rick nodded and then let her lead him into the bed room. Neither were in the mood to do anything more than get ready to sleep. Rick stripped down to his boxers while Kate pulled off her trousers and swapped her top and bra for the baggy shirt she slept in. They got into the bed and both moved quickly into the centre of the bed. Kate moved the pillows so that rather than a gap between the two where they were going to sleep they had a pillow to share. Rick lay down and Kate turned away from him and pressed herself against his chest. He wrapped an arm around her middle and then rested his head just above hers, his chin in her hair.

"Good night Rick," Kate muttered, linking her fingers with his where it rested on her stomach, "I love you."

"Love you too," Rick replied, kissing the top of her head lightly.

They both feel silent but it took them both a long time to fall asleep, both were too busy thinking about what had happened, what would happen and what, now, may never happen at all. They didn't talk however, just lay in silence with their own thoughts before they both eventually feel asleep. Kate was the first to go, her busy few days catching up with her, and while it was fitful she didn't once wake up.

It took Rick longer to fall asleep, a lot longer, because his mind wouldn't stop going over and over everything that was happening. When he felt Kate's breathing even out as she fell asleep he moved slightly so that he was even more closely pressed to her back. With the hand that had been under his head he began to play with Kate's hair, wrapping it round his fingers and running his fingers through it lightly. He concentrated on the feel of Kate's hair between his fingers, how silky and smooth it felt. Because he was concentrating so fully on that his mind went blank and he soon feel asleep, his fingers still tangled in Kate's hair.

He however didn't sleep the whole night through like Kate did. Every few hours he would wake up and every time it would take him just a little bit longer to straighten out everything that was happening in his head, and each time it happened he got a little more panicked. Since he didn't want to wake Kate though, she needed sleep more than he did, each time he would just go back to playing with her hair until he fell asleep again.

In the morning Kate was the first to wake up but she stayed in the bed, just enjoying the feel of Rick's arm around her middle. Their fingers will still linked and she could feel the tightness in her hair which she guessed was Rick's fingers in her hair. He used to do that all the time when she had been back in New York and it was a familiar feeling to her now, one she knew she would miss if they couldn't find their suspects. When she felt Rick beginning to stir she turned over and watched as his eyelids fluttered before he opened his eyes completely.

"What time is it?" he asked, not really taking any time to greet Kate as he normally would, a light kiss on the forehead at the very least.

Kate didn't comment on the fact that he'd broken what had become their morning routine; he was after all under a lot of stress at the moment, as was she, and answered his question. "It's a little after six."

Rick nodded, "We need to get up and go don't we?"

Kate nodded in return, "Yeah we do. We'll have a chance to have breakfast and a shower before we go back to the office and see if McCord and Hendricks have found anything on Dreamworld or Valkyrie."

Rick blinked a few times before he pulled his arm away from Kate's body and untangled his fingers from the hair that Kate was now practically lying on. Once he was untangled Kate got out of the bed first, seeing that Rick didn't really want to move, and headed out towards the kitchen to start on breakfast, leaving Rick to have a shower.

It took Rick a moment but he eventually did get up and head towards the bathroom, relying on guess work more than anything else since he wasn't really all that familiar with Kate's new place. When he got into the shower he stood, his hands flat on the wall, and let the too hot water wash over his back and head. By the time he decided to get out his skin was pink but he felt calm and relaxed and his heart rate was low, which was a good thing if Kate had been right about a higher heart rate increasing the speed with which the chemical affected a person.

He dried and dressed and headed out to where he could hear Kate moving around in the kitchen.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry this has taken a while but college has been crazy. I have an hour commute each morning and evening and then 42 and a half hours of college a week which is taking a bit of getting used to. Oh and since I know a lot of you are American when I say college I don't mean Uni which is what you mean when you say college, I mean what you do before that. **

**Anyway, I hope you like this and it looks like it's going to be a few more chapters yet.**

They ate in silence again before Kate headed to go and get ready while Rick went over to where he had put the letters and found Kate's. He opened it carefully and unfolded the letter and picked up the pen. He couldn't believe that he had forgotten to write this when he had first written the letter but he was going to put it right while Kate was busy. He crossed out the word _Love_ and replaced it with _Always_ which to him felt more right than before. He re folded the letter and resealed the envelope before putting it back with the rest.

He then started to tidy up their dishes from breakfast before he sat on the sofa and looked up at the ceiling. That was how Kate found him nearly twenty minutes later when she came out of the bedroom, showered and dressed for the day. She watched him for a moment, waiting to see if he would register her presence, like he usually did when she walked into a room, but when he didn't move so much as a muscle she went forward and placed a hand on the back of his head.

He jumped at her touch and then sat up straight. He looked really disorientated for a moment before he realised where he was and who else was there. Kate didn't say a word as she offered him her hand, which he took, and pulled him up and off the sofa.

"Come on Rick," she whispered, "Let's go see if they found anything helpful."

Rick nodded and the two of them headed towards the door just as someone knocked. Kate let go of Rick's hand and moved faster towards the door. She opened it and gave McCord a weak smile when she saw her standing there. "Hi," she greeted, opening the door wide enough to let the other agent in.

McCord came in and gave Rick a nod. "I came to pick you up," she declared, "And take you back to the office, save you having to find a cab."

Kate nodded. "Did you find anything?" she asked.

McCord nodded. "But I'll tell you once we get to the office, it's easier that way."

Kate nodded but neither she nor Rick were completely about waiting for that long, especially given that Rick didn't have much time left at all. Kate was now beginning to regret that she had insisted that the two of them come home to sleep, but then she looked more closely at Rick and realised that while it may have wasted time but Rick was looking more alert than he had been yesterday, and it looked like McCord and the others may have found something, which made Kate feel a lot better about everything.

"You ready to go?" McCord asked the two of them.

Kate nodded and took Rick's hand again; she just wanted to be close to him for as long as she could. It took Rick a moment but then he gripped back and allowed Kate to lead him out of the house and towards the car that McCord had parked on the road. McCord followed along behind them, pulling the door shut as she exited.

Kate and Rick both got into the back of the car and while McCord gave Kate a funny look, she didn't say anything as she got into the driver's seat. Once everyone was belted in and the doors were shut McCord started the engine and they began the drive to the office.

Everyone was silent as they drove, Rick staring out of the window, Kate switching her gaze between the road ahead of them and her fiancée beside her. Whenever she was looking at Rick she studied him closely, looking for any signs that he was getting worse or that more symptoms were coming to the service. She also spent the time committing everything about him to memory. She already had everything pretty well remembered, the way he sat when he was talking to his mother or Alexis, the way his muscles in his back moved while he was putting on a jacket, but right now she just wanted to take the chance to refresh her memories and to remember how he was before things got bad, which undoubtedly they would before they got better, which she was sure they would.

They arrived at the office and McCord parked before they all headed up and into the office. Rick and Kate stayed close to McCord as she led them towards Villante's office where they could see Villante and Hendricks waiting for them.

"Sir," Kate greeted as they entered the room.

"Beckett," he returned, "Mr Castle."

Rick didn't say anything, just nodded and went and sat down, looking around a lot, obviously trying to get his bearings once again. Kate gave him a worried look but knew there was nothing that she could do, to help or even to comfort right now, so she concentrated on Villante and the others, waiting for them to speak.

"We looked into Dreamworld and Valkyrie," McCord started, "There was a lot of red tape but one of the techs managed to get us the information we wanted on Dreamworld, we haven't asked for the details because we don't want them. He found out that Dreamworld is indeed a ghost base in the Gulf and that Bronson was stationed there. He also managed to find out what, or rather who, Valkyrie is."

"Who?" Kate parroted, "Valkyrie is a person?"

Henderson nodded. "Once we got round the red tape we found out that Bronson and Valkyrie worked together out of Dreamworld while he was stationed over there."

"Who are they?" Rick asked, finally speaking up.

"They were a US citizen working within Al Qaeda who got killed in an op gone wrong. We have no idea what happened," McCord answered him, looking straight at him, "But we do know that something was covered up, there was no way it couldn't have been, and that Bronson was somehow involved."

"So this could be revenge?" Rick asked, "Someone taking revenge on Bronson and the others on messing up the op and getting Valkyrie killed."

Everyone nodded, that was what they had been thinking too. "Do we have any idea who might have stolen the chemical or who the next target might be?" Kate asked, hoping that either way they would be able to find the antidote in time.

"The techs were looking to see if they could find anything more on the mission, to find out who Valkyrie is," Henderson replied, "They hadn't got very far when McCord went to go and pick the two of you up this morning but they have gotten further since then."

Kate looked at Villante as he spoke, "All of you go and see how they're progressing but Agent Beckett I need to have a word with you first."

Kate nodded and the two of them waited for McCord, Henderson and Rick to leave the room. Once the door shut behind the three of them Villante asked, "Are you still managing to handle everything Kate? Is it safe to have you on this case given how personally invested you are?"

Kate looked out of the door, over to where Rick was following behind McCord and Henderson, looking a little lost, as she answered. "Sir, I can honestly say there is no one in this agency, on this planet, who want's this case solved more than I do."

Villante nodded, "I know that Beckett, I just wanted to make sure. How is he doing?"

"He's losing time," Kate answered honestly, "But he's more alert today than he was last night, although he does look more lost than he did."

"Good," Villante replied, "Now get to work Agent."

Kate nodded and left the room, heading over to where she had seen Rick and the others going. It was obvious that Villante was a little concerned about her ability to make rational decisions and her ability to keep it together but he had only known her a few short months, someone like Roy Montgomery or even Captain Gates wouldn't even have questioned her on whether or not she could continue.


End file.
